It WAS the best sex I’ve had in months. We cleaned up, talked, fucked a second time and decided we were gonna keep doing it. She told me that you made her aware what the limits were. I told her to ignore what you told her. You’re in love with someone else. You’re so far out of fucking line, telling her to keep things from getting emotional, that I can’t even think of an analogy to match it. How do I feel about this whole thing? Filthy. When I found out you’d cheated on me, I was horrified, devastated. Today you succeeded in making me do the same thing and I hate it and I hate myself for it. I don’t blame Cecilia. I don’t even really blame you. I could have refused, but now I feel guilty and dirty and ashamed of myself. Not because I cheated on you. This was your idea and you did everything you fucking could to make it inevitable for all involved. I feel awful because I betrayed my marriage. Maybe that was what you were aiming for, wanting me to feel tarnished so you’d feel we were. ”She nodded. “Man, I have to tell you, back home it’s a big deal. There’re people back home who would love to run everybody like that out of the country.”Montoya did not look happy at that, but didn’t disagree, either.I shrugged. I didn’t tell her the truth, that I didn’t really know my own feelings on that sort of thing. Did I like it when the news showed videos of people climbing fences and gang-rushing the border crossovers? No, of course not. That didn’t mean I wanted concentration camps and sending people back to starve or be killed. “Ma’am, I just don’t know. I’m just a fire team leader, not some big thinker type in Washington. Jose’s a good soldier. If his being in the Army means he can marry his girlfriend and she becomes legal, fine by me. Hell, open the Army up like that. I figure anybody who’s willing to fight for the United States can become part of the United States.” Most of the guys in the room seconded that thought.Everybody turned in early, including Bravo Three. It.
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